Sunday, March 24, 2013

Comments, decoded

First, what the heck? I hadn't realized my post on being sick un-published. Now it's reposted.

Second, what the heck? I hadn't realized my sisters thought they could offend me. So this post is about their comments on my last (newly republished) post.

No matter how many (or how few) people read my posts I can pretty much count on comments from my sisters, Elsha and Kari. Unfortunately for them they can count less on comments from me - specifically Elsha, because she has lots of readers and I think getting more than 8 comments is just greedy, and usually by the time I get on and read her post she's already had 9 or so. No comments for you! Kari doesn't post so much, so I rarely have to comment anyway. But when we do comment, there is so much left unspoken. Or un-typed. Or whatever.

Elsha said, "Kirsta. How does your family get sick SO MUCH?! Sorry lady"

Kari said, "Walking through your house sounds like my worst nightmare ever, lol. Do incidents like this make you want to be a germaphobe? Antibodies, schmantibodies! Maybe you'll have to start the glass-of-grape-juice-a-day routine to fight off bacteria and see if it keeps the sickness away. I hope you and everyone else feel better SOON! And I'm not too sad about being gone for the week while you air out your house. (This is all said very lovingly) :)"

In response to Elsha, I will say my family has been much LESS sick since we've moved to Pueblo. Seriously, Kari and I have discussed this, we really were always sick in Thornton. It was especially noticeable since we had rarely been sick in Fort Collins and Patrick was, until our move, a very healthy kid. What was the deal? First I blamed it on nursery at church, he ALWAYS got sick on Monday or Tuesday, meaning he picked it up a day or two earlier, and we were ALWAYS at nursery a day or two earlier. Besides, he started going to nursery the week we moved to Thornton, so it was impossible to compare to Fort Collins, maybe he would have come home sick on Monday there, too. But then it was bigger stuff, like how he suddenly developed really awful eczema at 18 months old, right when we loved in. Or how the winter we moved there he developed terrible asthma and was constantly doing breathing treatments, especially if he had any hint of another illness (which was often). We don't have any history of asthma and he hadn't shown a single symptom before, so again, what the heck? Eventually we chalked it up to "sick building syndrome," SBS, an idea I doubt we would have considered had we not both been exposed to it during various college courses. SBS! It's real! Like, REAL real! Legionnaire's Disease, which is spread through HVAC and water systems, was in the news 6 times in 2012 for outbreaks from Chicago to Spain! We didn't suffer from Legionnaire's Disease, of course, but what I'm SAYIN' is that SBS is REAL. I linked that sucker, it's at And we're pretty sure that somehow our house contributed to us getting sick a lot, or staying sick a lot - maybe our immune systems were compromised from being there so when we picked something up it felled us instantly.  Kari decided (or noticed), in hindsight, that she got sick during or immediately after every visit to Thornton, so she backs up our theory. Even prior to my discussing our SBS with her, she and her husband talked about us (behind our backs! *sob!*) and had to admit that maybe they were wrong and we don't have "the sick kids" because since moving to Pueblo we've rarely been sick. UNTIL NOW, of course.

So Elsha, you have accidentally lumped our "sick all the time" Thornton sick with "rarely sick but unfortunately on death's door when we are" in Pueblo. It's two very different things.

Now for Kari, my house IS her worst nightmare. It's MY worst nightmare, and I'm not easily scared. I actually had a very stressful dream last week about winning the Lottery, but this was MUCH worse (and with much less money involved). I had no false ideas about hanging out once it was clear this was going to be serious because I know she's a germophobe. I don't think this awful episode will really change me - I still let me kids finish each other's snacks and drinks, we share everything from toys to baths to beds, Ethan gnaws on stuff off the floor (toys! not, like, dirt clods), and it's just how it goes here. I'm always up for more antibodies, but maybe I WILL have to try the glass of grape juice a day trick... it won't last long, though, I can already tell you, because my kids would drink my entire grocery budget in juice if I let them. I've spent much LESS money on food this week, if you're in the mood to reeeeeaaally stretch for a silver lining.... but it HAS changed how much I do laundry, wipe down door handles, and bleach the tub, so I think I'll be sticking with some small habit changing.

I realize both these comments are, as Kari spelled out, "said lovingly," and that's the funny thing - I don't think there's a single comment my sisters have ever left that I've taken less than lovingly! We take our lives and sculpt them into posts and Elsha points out my incorrect grammar as GrammarGirl, I point out outfits in her pictures that I loved on my own kids!  It may seem we've missed the forest for the trees, but the truth is we ARE the forest, we three (and our hubs and kids), so we might as well point out the trees, eh? I doubt there's much my sisters could say to my face that would hurt my feelings, either. After so many years growing up together, rooming together, fighting, agreeing or agreeing to disagree, I have this weird buffer that makes me not take anything too harshly from them. My sisters can tell me I gain weight in my face when I'm pregnant, have legs like a saguaro cactus when I don't shave (as usual), have curves like a ruler, and am totally NOT my dad's favorite child (well, only Elsha would say that, Kari and I know the truth), and I know it is all said lovingly and it doesn't bother me at all. It is SO WEIRD. For you other folks at home, don't tell me my face is fat. But from my sisters it's honesty from a deep loving, understanding, stark naked place; I don't have to freak out that their comments reveal that our relationship is superficial and they've just been talking about me behind my backs all along. Except Kari... she's suspect. I say that lovingly :)


Jeanette said...

I read your blog all the time, but I can never come up with a comment fore creative than "so fun!" or "eeew!" Your sisters are much more entertaining. :-) But I always enjoy the humor in your writing. Hope you are all feeling better!

Jeanette said...

"more creative" not "fore creative" :-)

Elsha said...

Now, do you actually *look* at my comments before you don't post one? Because I reply to many comments, so sometimes "9 comments" means 5 comments from readers & 4 replies from me! (This is me pestering you to comment more on my blog.)

P.S. I love this post.

Kari and Jonathan said...

I may talk behind your back but only lovingly :) it's not that you CAN'T offend me, it's just that I don't hold onto it for very long, like I would with someone else's comment. Im so lucky to have you girls! Can't imagine my life without you!