Jealous? You should be

Jonathan was getting rid of a shelf that had sat in his workshop for a while; it was pretty rough but they offered it to us before donating it or throwing it away.  I initially declined because I've been trying to pare down our shelves - we have (well, had) a number that were just cheap and obnoxious and unmatching, so I told them to donate it.  They had it out on their drive when a homeless man, as Jonathan describes it, asked if they could hold the shelf for him and he'd be back with a truck.  What truck? For what house? But sure, they'd hold it for a few days. Meanwhile I visited Kari's house (weird, we NEVER hang out!) and saw the shelf and it wasn't flimsy or cheap like the ones I was getting rid of, this was a shelf with POTENTIAL! (It was also a shelf with dirt, grime, leaves, and some mouse poop on it). So I said if the homeless guy never showed I WOULD take the shelf. 

Joe said I was a hoarder.  The homeless guy never showed.

Well who's the hoarder NOW, punk?  Cutest shelf ever!